Five Popsicles

When a girl feeds a guy, especially when that girl is a starving and poor college student, it means she likes you. And ice cream, Popsicles, and other delectably sugary frozen treats mean the most. Think about it: Girls buy said treats because they need something to stuff their faces with whilst wallowing in self pity over unrequited love. So, if a girl sacrifices her means of coping and offers up the deliciousness to the cause of her wallowing in self pity, she thereby manifests her love to him. It's really not that hard to understand, and yet men just don't get it. Do we invite creeps over to share in our sugary goodness? Heavens no! Why? We don't like them, and thus we do not want to give them the wrong idea, which offering them yum-yums would indeed do. Do we invite our wanna-be (and by wanna-be I mean we want them to be) lover men over to share our spoils? Heck yes we do! Why? Because we want them to think more sugar is an option. And no, I'm not talking about the processed variety, rather the sugar one might extract from the sweet, sweet lips of a young lady. What do you not get boys? We feed you deliciousness because we love you.